Breaking the Mold

Much of the talk I’m seeing that is going on about the possible changes made to diagnosing GID in the DSM5(especially in children) are repeatedly expressing how these changes are playing right into the gender boxes of male and female. Implying that there is critically something amiss with male and female, there isnt. The “boxes” that we must dismantle isn’t the boxes of male and female but the cage males and females have been shoved, dragged, beaten, shamed and raped into based on DOING rather than BEING!

Thousands of years of male and female roles reinforcing each other with each and every new generation (which may have began innocently enough due to different (different-not better) abilities of the majority for survival) are now believed by most to equal “natural”. As in it is natural for women to want to dress in high heels and skirts, it is natural for men to have short hair and always wear pants, it is natural for girls to play with dolls, it is natural for boys to play with toy trucks or guns, natural so much so that whenever one deviates from what is “natural” there MUST be something wrong with THEM and they MUST be FIXED!

And the fact that there is this GID (created by a man who advocated consensual pedophilia no less) illustrates the systematic pathological need of society to utilize its hetero-patriarchal medical machine to “cure” the deviates who deviate under the ruse of “curing” rather than the truth of “normalizing”. And the sad part is there are plenty of people who have let themselves be brainwashed into believing there is something wrong with them because they are not “natural” because they deviate and are all too ready willing and able to prove hetero-patriarchal society right by foaming at the fucking mouth on their fucking knees begging and pleading for the hetero-pat-medical machine to stamp and ap/prove them “normal”!

How can we argue that there is nothing wrong with male and female but the cage(roles) that tightly wraps ’round male and female like some gordian knot when there are plenty of people all too willing to prove society correct by adhering to society’s male/female prescribed ideas by means of carving themselves up through drugs and body mutilation??

It is time those who naturally deviate or those who are tired of playing at “male and female” collude our efforts to dismantle society’s snug cage before we’re all of us, are pared into the mold.

dirt

DMS5-GID Here is the link (thanks to whoever sent me it) to the current draft for the next version of the  DSM due out spring 2013. I MUST say a few words about what this current draft has listed as the criteria for diagnosing GID in young girls in 8 simple questions for parents!

The question I would like answered is has someone channeled Freud from the fucking great beyond? The 21st century and we’re revamping “penis envy”? These questions are primarily pathologizing DOING rather than BEING! Every Butch who has ever lived would when thinking back on her childhood feelings answer “very strong” to every single one of these questions and most run of the mill dykes would answer similarly! Hell most tomboys who grew up to be typical hetero women would answer similarly. I asked my straight niece these questions yesterday and based on her answers she would have been diagnosed with GID!WTF?

The original premise of “SRS” was about conforming individuals to the status quo. It was ignorantly believed those who believed they were the other sex were all homosexual, so switch the sex and automatically heterosexualize a whole group of (mostly)men and women, thereby “normalize” them and this is exactly what is going on still! This is a there is only ONE way to be a male and only ONE way to be a female and if for any reason one deviates from them they MUST be FIXED. Well I’m here to fucking tell ya, I aint broken! I may not be the woman you see on billboards and beer commercials but I am NO less female than any of those women.

A question I heard all through my childhood and still hear and asked of me in regards to Butches is “why do you/Butches dress like men”? My permanent reply? When they start making clothes for Butch women then I will proudly dress Butch! As a child this was a question I couldn’t answer and a question no baby Butch today can answer because she doesnt know what Butch is! Clothes, toys, play etc that have been labeled “boy” by hetero-patriarchy are the closest things baby Butches have that matches some of their feelings/sense of fun/comfortability. It in no way shape or form indicates that they desire to be boys! Given the choice between boy/girl if most of what you are identifying with is closer to boy than girl, because you do not have any other options, what exactly are you suppose to do? This IS Freud’s “penis envy” all over. Women didnt want a “penis” they wanted the whole world the “penis” had access to that they as women did not!

If we let this nonsense go through we are placing a death sentence on the heads of every baby Butch going forward! And that is NOT an exaggeration, its a fucking fact. Because if the “trans” disorder mainstreams accompanied by the criteria questions for GID, baby Butch girls will be trannified into societal conformity before they ever have a chance to be their natural subversive selves!

If you are Butch, love Butches, we need to have some serious organization to stop the hetero-patriarchal medical machine from causing our extinction.

dirt

The Totality of Femme

I roll out of bed leaving a warm dream filled Butch behind, its early, a good hour before my baby needs to arise. She can shower, dress sip a cup of coffee and be off in 30 minutes. Me? I need to get up now if I have any hope putting myself together before work. I go through my morning routine of showing, shaving, plucking, putting on make-up and dressing along with having the coffee ready before my Butch awakes. Many moons ago with my then routine of a quick shower and towel dried hair I could have slept in with my Butch, but those would have and were blue moons because there was no Butch. I let the lesbian feminism I so wanted to be a part of convince me Butch women were products of patriarchy, the enemy, along with my salon styled hair, my pretty clothes, my make up, my heelz, in fact…me…for being Femme. I gave it all up in favour of “sisterhood” and “solidarity”, believing I was part of something that would change the world. Instead, it only changed me.

My plain look didnt stop the men with leering gazes from asking me what book I was reading or how I’m liking the change in weather, all in some vain hope that the book or warm sun was going to be their vile accomplice in getting me into bed. My plain look didnt add any numbers to my weekly paycheck. My plain look didnt get the federal government to pass an equal right amendment. My plain look didnt stop men from abusing and raping women and children. My plain look didnt change me from being a woman therefore “not management” material. My plain look didnt even grant me the lesbian visibility it promised. What my plain look did do is alienate me from me and me from the Butch women I desired with my whole being. For a while at least, but just for a while.

Today as I kiss my Butch and leave the house I leave behind as I take her with me the Femme I swore long ago I would NEVER again remove. But while I do not take her off, neither is she recognized, anywhere I go. Even when I out myself to people;  “oh are you married”? ” no I’m a lesbian”, she remains unseen. Unseen because the totality of Femme is invisible even in the flesh. Example: I go to a function through work where I meet people that I do not work with. I mix, I mingle where upon at some point in the evening a man ask me “what does your husband do”? I politely reply “My girlfriend works in so and so. I’m a Femme lesbian” The man seems slightly taken aback and more than slightly interested. Before I can say another word a female co-worker of mine comes up and the man quickly says “oh is this your girlfriend”? Then I do what I always do, I open my purse, pull out my pocket book to the picture I have of my Butch and I and say “no this is my girlfriend”! The man says nothing more and walks away seemingly in confusion and disgust.

Even when declaring Femme lesbian I remain invisible, all that is visible is “lesbian”. If I strictly say “Femme”, people go blank, when I add lesbian they immediately go to girl on girl porn. This is what I mean about the totality of Femme. Younger Femmes, self hating Femmes are so quick these days to separate themselves from Butches. But Butch is a major component in MY totality of Femme. Because if she doesnt come into view then I remain invisible, the lesbian I am remains invisible. I’m not interested in being the star in the fantasies of straight men! That little “lesbian” bubble they all carry around in their brains to please their pricks quickly goes POP when they see my Butch. The “lesbian” thrill loses its appeal, then the lesbian we both are becomes invisible.

This is a typical day for me as a Femme, explaining, ignoring, half explaining, half ignoring all to no avail, all to remain unseen in my entirety. Most days I do not think about it, some days I think too much about it and other days I feel a weariness. I feel a burden and the weight of that burden which seems to bury me with yet another layer of invisibility, another layer my painted nails have to struggle to claw through. But when I put my key into the lock of our house, when I walk through that door and my Butch greets me with a hug and kiss I become whole once again. I’m seen. I exist. I’m loved.

dirt